Tuesday, January 10, 2012

Grow up, Facebookers!

I am a bit of a Facebook junkie.  I am pretty much logged in all day everyday - even if I am not actively doing anything in it.  I have found FB to be great for many reasons.  I have happily reconnected with many people, one of which was my neighbor when we were kids and we hadn't seen or heard from each other in over 20 years.  We amazingly picked up right where we left off all those years ago :) I have quickly sold a few unwanted items though FB that I had previously listed on Craigslist with no bites.  I keep my out of state family and friends up to date on the growth of my son through pics, videos and funny stories.  I learn about new music and see what artists friends are currently working on.... oh and I almost forgot, Words With Friends!!!  Enough said, right?!  haha!  I think that FB is wonderful.  But there are some things that people do on FB that befuddle me.

  1. Facebook balls.  I don't understand it.  I will share a (hopefully) quick story.  One day I received a friend request from this woman (who shall remain nameless).  When I saw the request, I was like, "Oh hell no" and immediately declined.  About two days later, I receive this mile long inbox message from her.  She basically told me in the email how she had been wanting to confront me for years but regrettably hadn't and she felt now that FB was the perfect platform for her to do so.  I won't get into what our cyber beef was about, but I will tell you that this beef (that I wasn't aware we even had) goes back over 15 years!  You're telling me that you have wanted to confront me about something you felt so passionate about for over 15 years but hadn't?  You knew where I worked, where I lived, even had my phone number but you felt that contacting me 15+ years later through a social media network best suited you.  Hmmm??  Don't get me wrong, I am not a fighter.  But I also don't believe in trying to threaten, belittle or bully someone behind the safety of your computer screen.  If you have something to say, say it - with your mouth to the person - oh and when it is relevant, haha!  
  2. Airing Dirty Laundry.  I have a few friends who put so much embarrassing, demeaning, personal information on Facebook.  WHY?!  "This dude thinks he can just treat me like sh%t.  I know what he did with my sister, so if he thinks I don't, here is a message for you (insert name here) - put your glasses on and read this!  I know what you did in MY bed with MY sister while I was at work."  Or "I found a crackpipe in my husband's sock drawer"  Facebook is not your therapist.  Facebook is not your friend.  Shoot, sadly most of the "friends" everyone has on FB aren't even your friends!  When you put this stuff out there for everyone to read most people are either: a.) amazed that you put yourself out there like that for everyone to see.  b.) laughing at you.  c.) being entertained by your soap opera and eagerly awaiting the next episode (which without fail always airs) d.) gossiping about what you just wrote or e.) all of the above.  I think that some of them post like this thinking that they are making the person who wronged them look bad, but they aren't.  Sure they sound like a real jerk for what they just put you through...but we ALLLLLLL know that he does this to you on a weekly basis and you clearly allow it.  Just stop!  Either shut up and deal with the fact that this is the life you choose to subject yourself to OR leave him and move on. Either way, stop posting about how terrible you ALLOW people to treat you.  It makes you look foolish and weak and you are just setting yourself up for other manipulators and abusers to do the same to you.  You are obviously tolerant of such behavior.  And if a loved one has a drug problem, don't share that with all 1275 of your closest friends!  C'mon!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Of course I have the option not to read, but let's be honest, I can't NOT read it.  It's like a bad car crash, it's horrible.  You know you should turn away but you just can't tear your eyes away from it.  
  3. Confessions of crushes/love.  Facebook is not the place to tell the girl you had Chorus with in 7th grade that you were madly in love with her via inbox message.  What is she supposed to say to that?  "Um, oh I had no idea...so um, how about those Celtics, huh?!" Or better yet, when you are "actual real life" friends with someone and they tell you in a chat message their true feelings for you.  AWKWARD!  That's when you say "someone's at my door, brb.".... and never come back and totally avoid them for the rest of your life.
  4. Flirting with other people when you are in a relationship or married.  Just wrong and plain stupid.  Most adults (should) know that whatever happens on FB will be brought to light.  There is no privacy on Facebook.  I have watched people's relationships end over a raunchy comment on a risque pic of someone who was not their wife.  Or even more stupid; accidentally posting an inappropriate message meant for someone's inbox but posting to their wall and your spouse sees it (along with everyone else).  If you want to be with other people why are you in a relationship?  Do your mate a favor and just be honest.  Break up if necessary and then feel free to flirt, comment etc. with no worries.  Spare your significant other the embarrassment of the world knowing you don't respect them.
  5. ALL CAPS and bad grammar.  DER IZ NUTTIN MOR AGGY DEN C'ING A STS WIT ALLLLLLL CAPZ N DAM NERRR NOT 1 CORRCKLY SPELT WURD N NO PUNKUASION IN SITE U JUSS READ IT OVA N OVA TRYNA FIGHURE IT OUT LIK ITZ A PUZZLE A SUMTHIN.  Ok, I seriously can't take typing like that anymore, haha!  That took me like 20 minutes.  So annoying.  I went to school with these people.  I know that they have a somewhat better education than this.  Why are you typing like that?  I will just assume that your Caps lock button is broken, but what is the excuse for spelling like that??  Is that cool?  Is that what the cool kids are doing??  STOP IT! (Yup, that was all caps!)
It's time for these people to grow up.  Use Facebook a little more intelligently.  Think about what you think when your friends post like this and make a vow to yourself to never do it.  Have fun, but use your head, folks.


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